Swapping
by Grayecam
Summary: DG, HP, RHr, LB...Pansy and Ginny decide to swap boyfriends, Luna decides to find out about Slytherin boys, and Hermione decides it's time to get her man.Lots of OOC, but wrote in the spirit of fun.


Hermione Granger wondered how she had managed to end up in detention that afternoon. She had known before she said it that pointing out Professor Snape's error in class was a mistake. But still, her big brain had overloaded her even bigger mouth and she had blurted out the proper answer. And Snape, being Snape had promptly replied that since she had such fervor for proper grammar, she could see to it that all the worksheets with the error on it were corrected. By hand.

She had more important things to be doing this afternoon. She had a History of Magic essay due in a week that she hadn't even begun research on, an Arithmancy test in a month to study for and a hall duty schedule for the next two weeks to make out. She thought longingly of the new book on Charms in the library for a moment, and then sighed and focused on the papers before her again.

At least she was in good company. Ginny Weasley sat at the table next to her chopping gillyweed. Ginny had also let her mouth get away from her. Only she hadn't been trying to politely correct a mistake. Ginny had given the wrong answer in class, Snape had made a snide remark about the Weasley family being rather lacking in intelligence and Ginny hadn't taken it well. Secretly, Hermione had wondered if he wasn't somewhat right when she heard the comment Ginny made in return about Snape resembling a greasy clabbert.

Also in attendance was Luna Lovegood. Poor Luna hadn't done anything really. She was just being Luna. When Snape brought up the properties of billywig wings, then commented on how it was such a shame they didn't exist. What did he expect but that Luna would dispute it? Luna wasn't doing anything except sitting at a table looking through a Witches Weekly Fashion Magazine. Snape had stopped assigning her tasks for detention when he told her to mop the floors and the Potions classroom had ended up a strange shade of purple.

Looking over to the opposite side of the room, Hermione resisted the urge to grimace. What Pansy Parkinson had done to get herself detention with Snape, she couldn't imagine, but it must have been pretty bad. Snape NEVER gave the Slytherins detention, ignoring bad behavior that would have had the other Professors foaming at the mouth. Yet, there she was, reading a Potions text, occasionally scribbling something on a piece of parchment beside her.

"Oh, look at that!"

Hermione glanced back over to where Luna was sitting. "What is it Luna?"

Luna glanced up with a glazed look in her eyes. "Oh, Hermione. Sorry, didn't mean to disturb. It's nothing. Just a perfectly lovely dress. Would you like to see?"

Hermione didn't really care for Witches Weekly, but she had to admit she was curious to see what sort of dress would interest Luna so much. The girl's odd fashion sense was often very…interesting.

Hermione wandered over to have a look at the dress in question. Naturally it was outlandish, at least in terms of Hermione's taste. A fluffy pink concoction, bedecked with tons of ribbon and lace and huge puffy sleeves. "Um…it's very nice, Luna."

"It's a bit too frilly for me, "said Ginny, over Hermione's shoulder. "That one's more to my taste." She pointed to another dress, below the cotton candy vision. This one was a straight, spaghetti strapped dress, with a bodice of gold satin with a holly print in green, and a forest green velvet skirt. It really was lovely, and Hermione thought it would be beautiful on Ginny.

"Oh, please! How boring!" exclaimed Pansy Parkinson. No one had noticed her sidle up to the table and they all jumped at the sound of her voice. "There's a dress for you." She tapped one of the pictures on the opposite page. Her dress of choice was a slinky, strapless creation of silver sequins, tight fitting and flared at the knee.

"That's a bit much, don't you think?" she said.

"Only for little ninnies like you, Granger," said Pansy, making a face.

"Actually, I think it would suit you, Parkinson," said Ginny, looking thoughtfully at Pansy. Pansy opened her mouth to say something Hermione was sure would be nasty, but then closed it and looked back at the magazine.

"Which one do YOU like, Granger?"

"Oh, I don't know, "said Hermione, looking at the pictures and all the colors and styles of dresses. Suddenly one jumped out at her. It was absolutely perfect. A royal blue satin bodice, draped over layers of white tulle. "That one."

Pansy looked surprised. "You know, you'd look great in that dress."

"Thank you," Hermione said, surprised at the compliment. "But it's not as if I'd have anywhere to wear it. It'd just sit in the closet gathering dust."

Ginny and Luna echoed agreement and Pansy looked at them all with confusion. "What about the dance? Aren't you all going?"

"Well, we'll probably go but why would we spend money on dresses like this when we've no one special to go with?" said Ginny. "Not all of us have the galleons it would take to buy these dresses just to waste, like you do Parkinson."

"I realize you're dirt poor Weasley, "sneered Parkinson and Ginny suddenly found herself reminded strongly of Draco Malfoy, "But I thought that at least the two of you had steady boyfriends. You remember, the two heroes of Hogwarts, Weasley and Potter?"

"Ron and I are just friends," said Hermione, almost before Pansy finished speaking.

Pansy gave her a knowing look. "And that's because you want it that way?"

Hermione turned a bright shade of red. "Yes."

"I don't believe you."

Hermione opened her mouth to retort but Ginny was too quick for her. "No one else does either."

"Ginny!"

"Well, I'm sorry Hermione, but it's true. Everyone knows you fancy Ron."

"Ron and I have been friends for years. Why would anyone think I fancied him?"

Luna, who had been rather quiet during all of this, piped up. "I think that most folks don't set flocks of psychotic canaries on people who are just their 'friend', Hermione."

Hermione's mouth opened and closed several times as Pansy and Ginny dissolved into fits of laughter against each other. Hermione didn't know what was worse, realizing that everyone knew her secret or seeing her best girl friend and her worst girl enemy holding each other up from laughter at HER.

"It's ok, Granger, really. Even Slytherin knows Granger and Weasley are an item. The only ones who don't seem to realize it are the two of you!"

"Yeah, it's really time to do something about it, if you ask me, Hermione," said Ginny, speculatively. "If my git brother won't wise up and do it himself, then it's time you did it for him."

Hermione felt rather panicked at the idea of Ginny, Pansy and Luna planning for the future of her love-life. Thinking rapidly, she attempted a subject change. "And what about you? When are you and Harry going to get back together?"

Ginny looked uncomfortable. "Well, to be honest with you, I'm not sure I want to get back together with Harry. It just seems to have fizzled out between us."

Hermione looked at Ginny in disbelief. Ever since she had realized that Ginny was no longer a little girl, she'd always believe that she and Harry belonged together. When they had broken up after Harry, Ron, and Hermione had decided to go looking for the horcruxes, everyone had thought it was only temporary and that when it was over, the two would be together again. Since the trio had returned to school the following year though, things had been awkward between them.

"Don't look at me like that Hermione! I can't explain it. Things just aren't the same," said Ginny.

"Well, we've all been through a lot. Maybe you're just expecting too much from Harry. Perhaps he's waiting for you to make the first move," said Hermione, but Ginny was shaking her head.

Pansy watched the two girls with a strangely interested look on her face. Suddenly she piped up, "Well, if you're releasing your claim on Potter, I wouldn't mind a go at him."

All three of the other girls' heads snapped around as they stared at Pansy with open looks of shock. "What? He's cute, he's famous, and he's got plenty of money in Gringott's. Why not?"

"But…but…he's Gryffindor!" exclaimed Hermione.

Pansy shrugged. "So what? I snogged Seamus Finnigan. He's a Gryff too. Oh, you didn't know? Yes, last year, before my parents pulled me out of Hogwarts."

"I thought you were Draco Malfoy's steady girlfriend," said Ginny.

Pansy rolled her eyes. "Most people make that mistake. Draco and I are really just friends. Good friends, mind you, but friends. Our parents entertain the idea that one day we might be a couple, but we've known each other far too long for that. We're not suited. He's good for an escort and the occasional snog when I'm bored, but that's about it. Why? Are you interested?"

To Hermione's amazement, Ginny began to blush furiously. "Ginny! Don't tell me you like DRACO MALFOY?"

"No!" denied Ginny, but Pansy gave her a knowing look and she began to sputter, "Well, maybe I think he's nice looking. Oh, Medusa's hair! I think he's dead sexy, alright? I'd like to see if I could wipe that smug, arrogant look right off his face and-"

"Stop!" yelped Hermione, holding up one hand. "I don't think I can take anymore. I get the picture."

Pansy sneered, once again reminding Ginny of Draco, and said, "So Weasley, want to swap?"

"Swap? You mean swap Harry and Draco? We can't just do that. They aren't chocolate frog cards you know, to be handed about!"

Pansy gave her a smug look. "You obviously know nothing about boys, Weasley. Of course we can. It's all a matter of making them think it's their idea."

"If you don't want him Ginny, I'll take him," said Luna, causing the other girls to suddenly remember she was there. "I hear a Slytherin boy can really keep a girl on her toes. My toes need a good work out."

Pansy gave the girl a scrutinizing look. "You know Luna; I think I know just the Slytherin fellow for you. He'd be perfect."

"Really?" exclaimed Luna excitedly.

"Hold on a minute Parkinson," said Hermione. Ginny was quite capable of taking care of herself, and if Pansy messed with her, she'd find herself at the losing end of the great Weasley wrath, but Luna tended to be a bit naïve, and Hermione felt obliged to protect her from the likes of the Slytherin girl. "Why would you want to help Ginny or Luna?"

"Because you all amuse me, Granger. I don't have that many girl friends. I think I'd like to have a few and well, would you all trust a Slytherin girl?" The other three girls were silent, so she continued, " You needn't worry that it's some sort of a trick. I want Potter. And if helping the three of you gets him for me, I'll do it. You have to admit, I'm nothing if not persistent about getting what I want."

Hermione had to acknowledge this and was silent.

"What did you have in mind?" asked Ginny.

"Well," said Pansy, "This dance presents the perfect opportunity for all of us to point some fellows in the right direction…."

Severus Snape walked back into his classroom to find the four girls he'd left working in different corners of the room with their heads together.

"Ladies," he said, causing the four of them to jerk apart when they realized he was in the room, "since you all seem to be enjoying detention and each other's company so much, perhaps you'd like to join me tomorrow as well?"

To his surprise, the Weasley girl smiled, as did Miss Parkinson.

Smug look turning into a snarl, he said, "Tomorrow, same time. Now get out, the lot of you!"

"We'll finish this then," whispered Parkinson as she gathered her things to leave.

Snape shook his head and sighed. Whatever it was, with such an unlikely foursome, it couldn't be good.

Harry and Ron waited outside of the Potions classroom for Hermione and Ginny. They were both chuckling to themselves, thinking of all the wonderful fodder the ever-perfect Hermione getting detention was providing for them.

Harry mentioned a good teasing was in order for Ginny as well and Ron had clapped him on the shoulder and said, "I don't think so mate. She got me with a bat-bogey hex over the summer for just mentioning that fiasco with the hair-dye, remember? I'm not lining myself up for another one."

"Oh, but you wouldn't mind another round with the canaries, aye?" replied Harry.

Ron turned a bright shade of pink, but laughed with Harry. "Girls. Who can figure them?"

Harry's attention was somewhere else though. Ron followed the direction of his gaze and saw two familiar Slytherins coming up the hall towards them. "What the devil are they doing about?"

Draco Malfoy and Blaise Zabini approached the doorway where Harry and Ron stood.

"Weasel," Malfoy drawled, characteristic sneer on his face, "Can't civilized wizards go anywhere without running into rabble like you?"

"Well, there's just so many of them Malfoy. I imagine there's not too many places left for them to go. They seem to breed like rats, you know," Zabini drawled.

Draco sniggered.

"Go away, Malfoy, and take your minion with you," Harry scowled.

"I don't think so, Potter. You're in the dungeons. I live here, remember? You go away."

"Oh, don't worry, we will, just as soon as we collect Hermione and Ginny from Snape's detention," Ron spit out.

"Oh, did the mud-blood get detention? What a shame. I'm not surprised though. They ought to throw her out of the school."

Ron then started towards Draco, hands balled into fists. Harry grabbed his arm and said, "No, there's no point. He's only baiting you, Ron."

Draco smirked at Ron, but then the door to the Potions classroom opened and four girls spilled out.

They were giggling. Together.

The four boys who stood in the hallway gaped as Ginny said, "See you tomorrow Parkinson."

"Yes, see you then," replied Pansy with a wave towards the other three girls as she turned in the directions of the dungeons.

The two Slytherin boys and the two Gryffindor boys stood staring at each other for several long seconds. A wordless communion of confusion passed among them. Then each pair of them took off after their prospective female friends.

"What the devil was that about, Pansy?" asked Draco, trying to catch up with Pansy without lowering himself to running.

"What are you talking about, Draco, darling?" asked Pansy, doing her best to look innocent.

"Why on earth would you be NICE to those three?"

"There's nothing wrong with being nice to people once in a while, Draco," replied Pansy. "I'm tired of only hanging about with you and Blaise. I think it'll be nice to have some girlfriends."

Draco looked flabbergasted. Making Draco Malfoy look anything other than smug and arrogant was a feat unto it's self and Pansy was momentarily proud.

"But…but THOSE girls?" he asked, still incredulous.

"And who would you have me make friends with? Slytherin girls? Name me one girl besides me in Slytherin that you'd trust? No? I thought so. Who better to make friends with than the loyal Gryffindors?" Pansy said, raising one eyebrow.

"And what about the Ravenclaw? Lovegood?" asked Blaise.

"Oh, noticed her, did you Blaise?" said Pansy with a sly smile. Her plan was working already.

"Well, she's rather hard to miss, with her odd clothes and the off the wall things that come out of her mouth," countered Blaise.

"Yes, she can be a bit odd," agreed Pansy, "But isn't she lovely? All that blond hair. As I recall, you have a penchant for blondes, don't you, Zabini? She's very sweet and I get a feeling she's not nearly as simple as folks think she is."

Blaise turned and stared at the retreating backs of Luna and the others. Pansy almost bounced up and down with triumph. This part, at least, was going to be no trouble at all. When the raven haired boy turned back and caught her watching him, she smiled sweetly and turned to Draco.

"The war is over Draco. Remember, we all ended up on the same side in the end. Time to live in the present. And living in the present means getting on with the Weasleys."

Draco turned, much as Blaise had just done, and stared at the backs of the two red-heads as they traveled further down the corridor.

"Maybe. But I don't have to like it."

'You may not like it now' thought Pansy to herself as she slid her arm into his and continued down the hall, 'but you will before I'm done.'

"Gin, have you lost your mind?" asked Ron as the walked away from the terrible trio of Slytherins.

"Oh, Ron, get a grip," replied Ginny, not bothering to slow down.

"Get a grip? Get a grip? The girl's talking to Pansy Parkinson like she's her new best friend and she telling ME to get a grip!"

"And what if she is?" asked Ginny, stopping in her tracks and turning to her brother.

"Is what?" asked Ron, suddenly confused.

"Is our new best friend. Would that be so awful?"

Ron looked incredulous. "You must be joking."

"I'm not. They're always promoting house mingling. Hermione, Luna, and I just discovered Pansy isn't half bad," Ginny declared, a defiant look on her face.

Ron looked at Hermione. "Hermione, you too?"

"Well, maybe…" Hermione said, tentatively.

"And what about you Harry? Have you got something to say about who Hermione and I choose to be friends with?" asked Ginny, with a gleam in her eye that clearly said that he'd better have the correct answer.

Harry looked back at the group of Slytherins. He didn't like Malfoy, he wasn't overly fond of Zabini, but really, Parkinson had never bothered him that much. He watched her chin length black hair swing from side to side as she stuck and arm through Malfoy's.

He looked apologetically at Ron and then said, "No, doesn't bother me a bit, Gin. You're a big girl. If you say Parkinson is alright, then I guess she must be."

Ron threw his hands up in the air. "I'm surrounded by crazy people. Remember these folks are SLYTHERIN, people! They aren't Gryffindors."

"I'm not Gryffindor either, Ron," said Luna. "Does that make me bad too?"

"Of course not Luna. You're…different."

"Oh, lots of people tell me that," she replied. "Well, here's my hall. See you girls tomorrow."

"What does she mean, tomorrow?" asked Ron.

"We've all got detention with Snape again tomorrow," said Hermione.

"Detention again? And here I was amazed that you had it the first time. How'd you wind up with it again before you'd even finished the first one?"

"Well, we were talking to Pansy, and Snape came in and caught us and-"

Ron pounced. "See, already she's started to be a bad influence on you two! What is it? Is it because she's pretty? Do you think she can give you beauty tips or something? I thought you were smarter than that Hermione!"

"I'll have you know, Ronald Weasley, that I can make my own friends. I don't need you or Harry telling me who is alright and who isn't. If I want to be friends with Pansy Parkinson, then I will be and if you don't like it then you can just go play with an acromantula for all I care!" Hermione yelled at Ron. She glared at him for a moment longer and then flounced up the hall alone.

"Now look what you've done Ron!" said Ginny. "You've gone and hurt her feelings."

Ginny punched Ron on the shoulder and hurried up the hall after Hermione.

"What did I do?" Ron asked Harry, rubbing his shoulder.

"Well, let's see. You basically suggested that Hermione needed beauty tips so badly she'd make friends with someone awful to get them, you suggested she was too stupid to know who to make friends with, and oh, yes, you said Pansy Parkinson was pretty," said Harry, ticking the points off with his fingers.

"Well, she is pretty, although she's not my type at all. But why would Hermione care about that?"

Harry shook his head. "And you called Hermione dim."

"Flaming loony girls is what they are, the lot of them."

Harry laughed and clapped his friend on the shoulder as they turned up the corridor for Gryffindor.

Harry was sitting on the sofa in the common room later that night when Ginny approached him.

Flopping down on the cushion next to him she smiled when he looked up from the book he was reading. "Harry, we need to talk."

Harry laid his book aside and nervously pushed at his glasses. He had a feeling he knew what she wanted to talk about and he'd been expecting it for some time. "Ok."

"Harry, it's about us."

Harry looked about the room, trying to think of a way to escape. He desperately wanted to spare Ginny's feelings, so he'd avoided the whole situation the whole year. He had no idea how to tell her he just didn't feel the same about her as he used to. He loved Ginny, and always would, but he wanted his surrogate sister back, not a girlfriend. At least, not her for a girlfriend.

"Um, Gin-,"he began but she cut him off with a wave of a hand.

"Would you mind if I went first Harry? Thanks. I've just got to get this off my chest," she said, taking a deep breath. "I-love-you-Harry-but-I-don't-want-to-get-back-together-I-think-we-should-go-back-to-just-friends."

Harry was confused at the lightening fast words. Did she say? Did she want? He wasn't sure he heard her correctly. "Gin? Do you mean…you mean you don't…you aren't…"

Oh, Harry!" she cried, flinging her arms around him. "Please don't be too hurt. I'm sorry; I just don't feel that way about you anymore. I tried to, I really did."

"Wait, Gin, wait!" Harry said, peeling her off of him. "I'm not upset, just surprised. I feel the same way; I just didn't know how to tell you. It's ok, really."

Ginny looked shocked for a moment and then laughed.

"Is it funny?"

"Don't you think so," giggled Ginny. "We've both spent the whole year walking around feeling guilty and avoiding being alone together because we were so afraid of hurting each other, and all along we both felt the same way. Merlin, the wasted time! It's too funny really. We're both so dense."

Harry smiled. She was right. "I can always count on you Gin, to see the lighter side of things. I don't know what I'd do without you; so, even if we aren't meant to be together, don't go away, ok?"

Ginny smiled. "Never."

"So, I guess you've decided to tell me this now because you've got your eye on someone?" Harry asked, giving Ginny a keen look.

"Oh, no. Just because we've officially ended doesn't mean you get to go straight into big brother mode. Mind your own business Potter!"

"Well, what about the dance?" he asked. "If you need a partner, I'd be happy to accompany you…as friends, of course."

"That's nice of you, but I plan on having a date by then. What about you?" she asked. "Seen anyone interesting?"

"Well, no, not really," he said then fixed her with a rakish grin. "Got any hot friends you can set me up with?"

Ginny looked at him with a gleam in her eye. He realized he had somehow played right into her hands, but he didn't understand how. "Maybe, Potter. Maybe I do."

Harry opened his mouth to protest but she just flipped her braid over her shoulder and was gone before he could say a word.

"Hermione?" Ron called, peeking around the open door of the Head girl's room. "Hermione, are you in here?"

Hermione lifted her head from the book she had it stuck in and sighed. Thank goodness she had freshened up her face after the cry she had when Ron had insulted her earlier. "Yes, Ron? What is it?"

The tall red-headed boy walked into the room. "I, I came to say I'm sorry Hermione. I'm not quite sure what I said that upset you so much, but I swear I didn't mean to."

Hermione was torn between the desire to bash him over his thick skull for giving her such a bumbling apology and the urge to throw her arms around him for caring that he'd hurt her feelings. She settled for a happy medium and gave him a small smile. "That's alright. I'm over it now."

His face brightened and the fishwife within her, shrieking that he'd gotten off too lightly, was mollified.

"Good. Are you going to dinner with us, then?" he asked, wandering over to her desk and scanning the surface, which was littered with parchments, books, quills and half used bottles of ink.

"Yes, just let me get my shoes."

"Hey, I've never seen you read one of these girly magazines before," he said, picking up the copy of Witches Weekly that Hermione had borrowed from Luna. "What are you looking at? These dresses? What for?"

Hermione struggled to stuff her foot into her shoe and quickly took the magazine out of Ron's hands. She decided to bite the bullet. Perhaps he'd take the hint. "Yes. I borrowed it from Luna. I was looking for a dress for the dance."

Ron frowned. "For the dance? You're going to buy a new dress? What's wrong with your old ones?"

"Nothing Ron, I just thought it would be nice to have something new for…well, just because."

"Hermione, do you have a date already?"

Hermione looked up at Ron and found the look on his face beyond her comprehension. It looked like a mix of anger and confusion. She felt herself growing defensive. "What if I do, Ron? Is that a problem?"

The look was definitely anger. "With who?"

"Why is that your business?" Oh, she was blowing this.

"Well, Vicky isn't here this year, so I guess I'm just wondering who would ask you besides him."

One part of her mind was telling her to cool it, the other telling her he was acting like a gigantic git and deserved what he got. The latter half won. "So you're saying no one would ask me to the dance? And his name is NOT Vicky!"

"No, that's not what I'm saying at all. And why would you care what I called Vicky? Still got a flame burning for that git, do you?"

"Well then, what ARE you saying, Ronald?" Hermione yelled.

"I'm saying…,"Ron yelled back, and then a strange blank look crossed his face. "I'm not saying anything at all, Hermione."

Hermione raised her chin and looked at him with distain. "Get out, Ron. Just get out and leave me alone!"

She flung the shoe she'd been holding at the door as it slammed behind him.

As Harry and Ginny entered the great hall, Pansy Parkinson waved from the Slytherin table. Ginny waved back.

"That is still really strange, Gin," said Harry, looking at the black-haired girl smiling towards them. He didn't think he'd ever seen her do anything but sneer or smirk in his direction before. She actually had a very pretty smile. He started at the thought, and then shook himself mentally. His mind must be going, finally.

"No, Harry, don't say that. She's really not a bad girl. A bit snarky, but not bad at all."

Harry resisted the urge to tell Ginny that snark was nothing new to him. After all, he'd been hanging about with her for all these years, and Ginny was nothing if not the queen of sarcastic retorts.

Ginny scanned the Gryffindor table and found Ron, sitting alone, glowering. Hermione was no where in sight. "Oh no!" she hissed under her breath.

She and Harry took up their places across the table from him and Ginny snapped at her brother, "I thought you were going to apologize to Hermione!"

"I did!" he snapped back at her. "I said sorry and everything was fine and then I asked her who it was that asked her to the dance and she went batty on me again!"

"What? Who asked Hermione to the dance?" asked Ginny.

"I don't know, but when I find out, I'm going to give him a good what-for!" said Ron, and gave a furious glare towards the general population of the great hall.

"Wait, that doesn't make any sense. I mean, when we were talking earlier…" Ginny shook her head. She was missing something. "No, Ron, tell me exactly what happened."

So, Ron repeated the whole conversation to her, and by the time he finished speaking, Ginny was glowering at him.

"Ron, you have the intelligence of a pygmy puff. In fact, I believe Arnold might be smarter than you."

"What? Don't you start in on me now, Gin. I did what I was supposed to do. I apologized, even though for the life of me, I can't figure out what it was I said wrong. All I did was ask who the git was that had the nerve to ask her to the dance. The girl's a complete loon, I tell you!" glancing at Luna, who had just walked up, "No offense, Luna."

"None taken,' said Luna, tapping Ginny on the shoulder. "Pansy wants to know if we can meet her after dinner."

"Sure, I'll just have to go pry Hermione out of her den. I imagine she's hibernating after my brother completely shattered her ego," Ginny said, leaving the table with one last glare at Ron.

"Meet us in the library," Luna called after Ginny.

Ron stared after his sister. Then he looked at Harry. "Would you please tell me just why I am the bad guy here? What did I do?"

Harry shook his head. "Mate, if you can't figure it out, I can't help you. I am not getting caught in between you and Hermione this time. Come on Luna, I've got to go to the pitch, I'll walk with you to the library, it's on the way."

"Draco, darling," said Pansy, "you know I adore you, don't you?"

Draco, who was sitting next to Pansy in the great hall said, "Yes, you've told me so for many years and I believe you. What's not to adore?"

Pansy laughed for a moment and then turned serious again. "I won't be attending the dance with you this year."

"What?" exclaimed Draco. "You're standing me up?"

"No, my love, I'm giving you proper notice."

"Well, I can't believe you aren't going to the dance. There's no way you'd miss an opportunity to leave all these unworthy young fellows yearning for you and all the girls insane with jealousy, so I can only assume I'm being cast aside for a…dare I even imagine it…a better offer?"

"Not a better offer, darling, just a…more interesting one," she replied, a grin on her face.

"Oh, do tell!" said Draco, leaning in closer.

At that moment, Ginny and Harry entered the great hall. Draco's eyes followed hers as Pansy waved to Ginny and smiled. He also noticed when her look lingered a bit on Harry.

"Potter! You're throwing me over for Potter? You must be mad!" Draco exclaimed as the look on Pansy's face registered in his mind.

"Draco, don't be jealous. You know how I am about trying new things. I've decided I want to try Potter."

"Woe be unto him," Draco sniggered. "Does he KNOW he's taking you to the dance?"

Pansy gave him a glare. "Not yet. But he will. Draco, you had better not interfere!"

Draco gave a mock look of innocence. Pansy had a brief thought about how utterly ridiculous that look was on the face of Draco Malfoy.

"Me? I wouldn't dream of it, love. I haven't forgotten what happened when we were five and I tried to keep you from turning your hair pink. Potter won't hear a word about it from me!"

Pansy nodded, satisfied, and then Draco said, "But you know, I expect some sort of favor in return for keeping this little secret of yours."

She rolled her eyes. "What is it you want?"

"Well, here you are, leaving me high and dry, without a date for the dance."

He was playing right into her hands. Once again she marveled at how easy men were to manage. "I'm sure you could find another date."

"Well, of course I COULD. But how beneath a Malfoy to have to ask someone at such a late date. If I had known you were going to dump me so unceremoniously, I could have accepted one of the many offers I had before."

Pansy bit her tongue to keep from making a sarcastic comment about his pompous attitude. "I think I can find someone suitable to replace me."

"You are aware of my high standards. I expect this person to make me look as superb as I would with you on my arm."

Pansy laughed, "Well, darling, you know I am absolutely unique, but I am sure I can find someone to compliment you almost as well."

Pansy looked across the great hall to where Ginny Weasley and Harry Potter were sitting with the Weasel King. He suddenly had a glimmer of what Pansy might be thinking. And he was amazed to find that, instead of being horrified by the idea, he was instead, quite intrigued.

"I need to speak to Luna Lovegood, darling. I'll see you later," Pansy said, rising, and giving Draco a kiss on the cheek.

Luna Lovegood walked across the great hall with Harry Potter. She always liked how the girls in the school stared after her when she was with Harry or Ron. She knew neither of them took her seriously, and that was ok, because, despite a small crush she had on Ron when she first met him and Harry, she wasn't really interested in them either. Still, it was nice to be envied by all the girls in school.

Ron, Harry, Hermione, and Ginny had become her good friends though. Luna actually thought she liked that better than having a boyfriend. She didn't have many friends.

Luna suddenly found herself jolted out of her thoughts by someone standing directly in her path. Blaise Zabini looked down at her. She smiled at him tentatively but he only frowned back at her.

"Zabini, get the hell out of the way," Harry growled at him.

"I'm not in YOUR way, Potter," Blaise replied, his eyes never leaving Luna.

"Leave her alone, Zabini."

Blaise looked up at Potter then. "Why? Are you claiming her, Potter? No? Then butt out."

"Look, Zabini, if you think you can just walk up and harass Luna-"

Luna laid a hand on Harry's arm. "You know what, Harry? I don't think he wants to harass me at all. I think he's trying to be nice, aren't you Blaise? You just wanted to say hello, right?"

Blaise looked confused. He opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out. He shut it promptly.

"And hello to you too, Blaise. It's been so nice talking with you, but I have to go now. I have an appointment and Harry has so nicely offered to walk me there. Let's talk again soon, though, alright?" and stepped around him. She stopped just behind him, looking back at Harry, who was still standing in front of Zabini. "Coming Harry?"

"Uh…yes, I'm coming!" stuttered Harry and swiftly moved around Blaise.

As they walked across the great hall, Harry leaned over and whispered in Luna's ear, "Luna, love, you really are a bit loony, you know?"

Luna laughed and said, "Oh, I get that all the time!"

Blaise Zabini settled himself beside Draco at the Slytherin table looking a bit addled. Draco, who had noticed what was happening because he was watching Ginny Weasley leave the great hall, asked, "Care to tell me what all that was about?"

Blaise looked distracted. "All what?"

Draco looked at him in disbelief. "All what? You must be joking! The entire school just saw you put yourself in the way of Lovegood and Potter. Of course I'm sure they all think you were giving them a dose of Slytherin wit. I, on the other hand, know you well enough to know that the look on your face right now is not the satisfaction of properly putting someone in their place. So, what was that all about?"

"Well, to be perfectly honest, I'm not exactly sure," said Blaise, staring at his plate.

"Now that, my friend, is scary!" said Draco, blinking. "I do believe someone's put a hex on all of Hogwart's. Everyone's lost their minds."


End file.
